My Daughter came home the other day gushing how we needed to watch this movie together, she beamed enthusiastically, voice all giddy, "you would just adore it." It is called Mother's Day, I just couldn't wait to see this with her as much as she rolls her eyes and gives me grief for crying at all my Hallmark movies, she is starting to get it and what a beautiful transformation this is to behold. Alas we sat down snuggled together wiping our tears at times, giggling at others and commenting all along it was one of those moments in time that Wonderment doesn't even begin to describe the emotion. It will be one of those priceless memories one day because I truly felt like a failure and how very much I needed that boost to get back up and try again. Right at that precise moment. She as I have mentioned is a tween and as I have found, I have been like a wonderer in the desert thirsting for just enough water at times to just wet my lips that are cracked from being so parched. I mean I am certain I now could be a contender on the Survivor show and I have merely only started to embark on these waters. Ever feel this way when pursuing your dreams and goals? I mean we are sometimes in our lives as we are dream chasing barely making it, clawing our way to the end of the day but we can attest, alas we made it. The thing I savored of this moment last night as I was laying down with her, snuggling, giggling, wrestling at times and the constant laughter but I was mulling over the depth, the beauty and the raw realness of how much we need that trueness from one another. As a beautiful bouquet of roses begins to open up, this is liken to my love wonder, my dream fulfilled, my Daughter. She has the beauty, the spell bounding fragrance and the miracle of it's blossoming but alas there too are the thorns. Such as in life when pursing our most passionate dreams these mirror in their comparison.
For twelve years I have poured my very existence into this incredible being and humbling isn't the word to describe the awe that overtakes me as I see it come back as second nature in her. Isn't this how we feel when we are amidst our dreams and reaching major goals we yearn to see fulfilled? Understanding that merely moments prior to all of this memorable movie night; she was banned to her room with utterly no contact with the outside world, I pulled out the big guns, no devices, no phone I even took her television remotes; just her and as my Mother called it, "Miss Astor" attitude where she found herself too big for her britches. She was to stay put until she could acknowledge what is not acceptable behavior and beneath her and our standard for her. I get it now when my Mother would sweetly say, "Sweetheart, this is harder on me than it is you." It is in those difficult moments of our dreams we have to have the certainty and joyful attitude even when it is most trying if we ever want to capture those dreams and succeed, and look not to what she is saying or how she is behaving but as Charlotte Bronte wrote, "I try to avoid looking forward or backward,and try to keep looking upward." What was revealed to me in my depths of pondering last night is I know I am doing what I know to be right even when I fail my heart is right, but to have that acknowledgement at a moment when I desperately needed it, gave me the gusto to inflame my heart and soul to delve deeper yet; as if I haven't even scratched the surface. As if a tape measure was showing me how little I had merely come thus far and how much more there was to yet go in exploring this dream of mine at hand and others I'm in pursuit of. The same may be said of you in the pursuit of your dreams.
For me to have this dream of mine as I have stated previously, I didn't think would ever come. You too may feel that way today. It seemed as if a lifetime had passed passionately waiting, however; once she was here I realized I am merely only beginning the pursuit of this dream. See I was violently nauseas my entire pregnancy, morning, noon and night. It was truly a nightmare when I allow myself to really remember but everyone around me was amazed at how I never complained and took it in stride and how happy I was amidst the difficulties because I was looking upward to what I was laboring towards and had waited so desperately long for. We need to be aware that many of us out there are obtaining enormous dreams, however, once capturing we merely stop toiling. I believe we should be on fire with fervency in obtaining and maintaining these dreams and goals. The funny thing, ironic really, is often times one dream comes and if cultivated, spring boards you to another one which is quite exhilarating to comprehend.
I leave with you a song from the movie my Daughter sang and danced to me giving to me as a priceless gift; I guarantee she regretted it by the end of the evening however I will sing it to myself daily if need be; no video but I find that it behooved my goal, because this is about you and your dreams. My desire is that you listen to this song and whatever your dream is let it sink in your soul that you are more than capable of achieving the goals that are on fire within you. I believe when you give with your entire being it comes back in spell bounding loads. This song is an aha moment for me I shall be using in the days to come not only with my Daughter but looking upward and believing within myself that if I pour my entire existence into achieving what truly burns my dreams within my core, my being; there are no limits to where we shall go, oh this my friends excites me for This IS the Wonderment of Life.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ePMuS18udVA
