SUPERNOVA

Walking along the shore, the air is crisp awakening my soul. The waves crashing were brassy. Overcome by their mightiness as they rolled in.  It is loud and mighty between the waves crashing in and the wind. Marveling at just how majestic nature is. Walking by the light of the illuminating moon. The stars as a field of flowers in the vast sky bestow their beauty. I am spellbound. I find myself relaxed and at ease. I am the audience. I have sat here in this same spot for many years.Since a very young adult. A lot of life has been lived. I have lived. I liken my life to the waves that roll in. Then crash upon the shore and as strongly as it came in, it goes back out. Each time it comes back to the shore it brings something new with it. Sometimes that something stays on the shore and sometimes it goes back out with it. The cranking of the waves is not half hearted. It is full of undeniable passion as it moves...churns.  It is always an awakening for me when I come here. I find my soul to be at Home. A haven to rest my bones as I lie upon my blanket in the sand; and a harbor where my Heart delights. Without unction my Soul is free to dance upon this sandy shore and my Heart frolics with the moving waters. As I open my picnic basket, the zest of life  floats out as a mystifying mist. These vapors dance as if a hallucination has carried me out to sea. I surf these mighty waves, exhilaration thrills my being. I crash into the waters and find fascination  meets me; introducing me to curiosity who draws me deeper. I now have lost my board and I  am dressed as if a diver. I am exploring all the secrets that lie beneath these mysterious waters. I race back to the top and eagerly gasp for air. My heart is racing and my breath is faint. I float and allow these waters to move me. Romanced by the brilliancy and splendor of the sky. As if the wind was hushed to a whisper it speaks to me. I recall the writings of Charlotte Bronte, "I avoid looking forward or backward, and try to keep looking upward."  Wonderment overtakes me. 

I saw a post from a friend this morning. It was a beautiful tree that had turned its leaves hue to the most brilliant orange. She put the scripture Ecclesiastes 3:1 "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under Heaven." The waves came crashing in upon my soul. This time the memories of all that had been brought onto my shore in my lifetime, and now are swept back out to sea. I am humbled for the lessons and blessings that each one taught me. Unleashing my heart full throttle while their time was gifted.  I lost a very special bracelet one day as I was caught in the undertow. I think of it often and dance around with the notion of whom will find it and pray that it brings such wonderment to them. Almost as if in me fighting the current,  the waters delicately yet skillfully unlatched my bracelet for it knew where it would travel. I would like to think this finding would bring delight as they told the tale of it being found. I miss that bracelet at times. But as soon as I realize I am missing it, the most satisfying sensation illuminates my being and floods my veins. Oh the beauty of our seasons of lives. Mystifying beyond imagination. My mind delights in the notion of perhaps meeting that person someday. Us being able to share our stories. If ever they offered to return it; I wholeheartedly would refuse so that our story would continue on. 

I just came inside from feeding my bluebirds and birds. My bluebirds lure me outside as they peck at my window or just cause a ruckus. As if a radar is on me for they seem to always know which room I am in. I giggle as I am typing. I felt something in my ponytail. I pulled it out and it was a leaf. Not just any leaf. The brightest hue like my friends post of that tree. I set it down in front of my keyboard and smile attesting to the smoothness and accuracy. To everything there is a season indeed. As the cooler breeze reminds us that the heat of summer is survivable. By the end of the brutal winter we are pining away for the summer. However, as each season ends and a new one begins the change and growth in us is noticed. As I have always measured my daughters growth on a wall in the kitchen; the same maybe said of us internally. 


My Daughter just experienced her first Homecoming week, game and dance. This was the only time the JV cheerleaders would perform at the pep rally and the game that night. We were keeping extremely late and the wee early hours for that week. It was also the end of the quarter.  We were running on pure adrenaline when Friday rolled around. A group of cheer Mom's met for lunch and shopped before arriving to the pep rally. I blew up Snapchat as the emotions flowed. Before I knew it, this vision in Red with leopard print heels was invading my closet for earrings. Then perched upon my vanity chair she asked for me to help her with her makeup as she never wears much of that.  My hands were shaking as I took the brush. I was telling myself, you did countless peoples makeup when you sold cosmetics for many years. But this was different in every way. It was that rush that I find in my spot at the beach as the waves were moving me. Then, there was that ring of the bell with her date on the other side of that door. The waves were working their magic. 

The parents were invited to hang out for several hours to eat and visit before their car would come. Before I knew it I was walking into a room of two dozen freshman girls spending the night after the dance. It was as if the spotlight was on and the mc was announcing my arrival as if I were a rockstar. The emotion that filled the room with giddy shouts and excited giggles erupting. They swarmed around me reaching for burgers, telling me how much they loved me as I was accessorized with two trays held high of Krystal's. Ah, wonderment filled my being. Breaking out breakfast pizzas and spread with girls surrounding my bar the next morning. I was moving chairs and barstools for all of them to sit. Gratitude flooded my being as they were busily chatting crazy. They were continuously eating while giggling galore snapping pictures and making tick toks. My cup overflows as I embrace these long awaited moments.  This portion of raising my Daughter finds us swimming in the waters, riding the upcoming waves together. Knowing that more is waiting for the both of us. Independently as well as collectively. Praying she will have the knowledge and discernment to choose that which sets her soul on fire. Standing tall as a mighty oak unashamedly proud. And as that mighty oak, giving shade to the weary and a resting place within her branches that house many. Protecting them and giving them a sense of security. Her roots are grounded in Love and stretch out far and wide. This is my prayer. My anthem. 


While living the dream of my Daughter, I am constantly adding to my vision board. I am crossing off completed goals and I am on the quest for conquering more. So much more. Liken to the day after her Homecoming; now a group of boys would join. There I laid upon the sofa binging on Hallmark. My Daughter snuggled up to me.  She was thanking me and then we chatted about our dreams to come for one another. We have been doing the Last 90 days challenge.  Now my Dream of her is cheering me on to ignite an inferno to capture all that Life bestows. For me. Whether in a matter of time I reside in a foreign land or on a farm or in a big city one thing remains. I have the chance as I always tell my Daughter that I regardless of my age or any other factor, I can be anything I want to be and I can do anything I want to do. May this fire within my soul burn brightly as a testament to others. Let Life crash onto your shore even if it knocks you down.  Laughter overtakes you when you follow your heart fearlessly. Even when you fail. You will find that you will get back up wiser and accepting of all that is washed back out to sea. Arms and heart wide open for all that will wash up when it's due season . Dream the Impossible and as this new book I have been listening to, Everything is "Figureoutable." This is The Wonderment of Life. xo