Day 364 of 365 for me is a bittersweet reflection. I see before me the things I did not accomplish or excel at. I also see the things I did and the changes this year brought into my life and I marvel at these all realizing how each moment was a piece to the puzzle, of the bigger picture I was unable to see at the time. Most importantly looking back over my life book of this past year, I am given the invaluable gift of seeing the struggles and hardships and how now I stand taller and stronger because of them. I am able to look back as wisdom whispers ever so softly that Life is so much more than one mind could ever perceive or heart would ever be able to contain or possibly Dream. With a heart overflowing with gratitude and love for all of my moments this past year I expect at Midnight to be one of great emotion. The irony of moments throughout my life in which it seemed I had failed, now looking back gauging upon the now I am able to see how I possibly could not, would not be able to Dream the Dreams I have now without those moments I was merely wishing away. I love seeing all the posts and I am inspired by the peoples passion I follow for living and relishing in all they experienced. Fired up and Power packed adrenaline surges for their New Year and wishes to all who read it. As I sit with my notebook examining resolutions from the past, I cannot help but react with a glimmer in my eye and a smile so mischievious that the ole sly fox is jealous. Wonderment consumes me transporting me into the vast unknown, liken to the astronauts as they take flight into the great vast world while we often times consume ourselves on the small and somewhat petty issues at hand not realizing that our focus becomes reduced and we are inefficient in not only achieving our Dreams and Goals but overachieving becomes reduced to getting by. As my pen becomes fueled with Magical flair I am delirious when I realize before me is a blank sheet of paper waiting on me. Life is waiting on me.
I realize I often speak of my Daughter, however her life and my job as her Mother showers me with invaluable nuggets of truth. The relevance of stages in our lives and in pursuit of our Dreams will often not come until we are ready. As I grow older, I am forced to learn to embrace this period of time necessary to allow myself to flourish in ways necessary to be responsible and equipped. How many times have we had our children beg us for things that simply was not their time and the unexplainable mystery of why it is not time is relevent to us when going after our Resolutions and Dreams as well. This picture will be framed and a given reminder for when I miss it with her and also to encourage me to keep going and never give up to dare to follow my Heart. I mentioned in a previous blog about her being on the JV Girls Golf team it was one of those moments I went all in following only my heart and gut with her challenging me all along the way. There were the moments I struggled; it was intense. I was debating and doubting myself asking close friends was I wrong to push her. For Christmas she received a new set of clubs and her High School names bag she will use on the jv team. Understanding my Daughter went out for the tennis team and I believe life would have been just fine had she had made the team. It was one of life's lessons when her friends made it except for her and she took in stride. This is where I saw her all along within the helm of my soul. It has been such an invaluable ridiculously phenomenal joy (and relief) to watch her unfold. Her reasons for challenging me and refusing this notion were figments of her imagination. Ideas and ideals that she has learned were not true and her confidence is growing emitting a beautiful fragrance as a field of flowers. My Daughter learned and taught her Mother lessons to reflect on for times to come. As I mentioned she stated this was her Favorite Christmas but what I didn't share was us on Christmas Night with my Family. While we dined on a Feliz Navidad Menu, My Daughter, Camille went around the table asking everyone what was their most special gift. Want to take a gander at what she had to say? Everyone at the table errupted in cheers, clapping and hooting with emotion so intense it was spewing from her as a gyser.
As we bask in the last hours of this year may we take the time to look over our lists and measure them with our Hearts. May we all raise our glass and erase the negative notions that people, society itself and most of all ourselves try to sway our Passion. With a heart full of Gratitude as I sing Old Lang Syne I am overcome with thankfulness of all of life's experiences this past year and the many years before. The Wonderment of Life is what is to come and the ability to not only Dream the Impossible but to live them.
Happy Merry New Year xoxo
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