HINDSIGHT IS 20/20

Sipping on my Bulletproof Coffee savoring as if a fine wine, the warmth soothing to my body as it is bitter cold here in the South. Pops of a roaring fire from my fireplace orchestrate a melody resounding that Mr. Winter has decided to visit a spell. Relishing in the delightful hue of lights of My Christmas Tree  as it beautifully showcases my ornaments as a work of art. I travel in time to places once visited or to moments shared with someone gifting me that particular ornament as they speak to me, moving me with more than their external beauty.  Powerful moments of reflection as these moments remind me of Hallmark times forgotten. I giggle at all the quips I have seen, those that talk of all that time between Christmas and New Years and chuckle every single time. I have also forgotten what day of the week it was or found myself in a blur of lull. Realizing in these moments of still and quiet, of losing myself in the here and now I am not thirsty and wanting, moreover;  I am basking in an oasis and find fullfilment. Lull is a hiatus, a break, a pause, an interval from the busy norm. Christmas takes it out of me every single year. I think my body is in detox from all the endorphins that were full of Merriment. Liken to gearing up for the big football bowl game you have been engulfed with it is liken to that morning after. We all experience them on different levels and contrasting variables however we all know that moment of now what?! Taking my hiatius if you will after experiencing what my days from being a teenage Daughter claims was her Favorite Christmas, I took my time and as in working out changing the interval level, I did just that this week to prep me for New Years. I have written in past blogs on Resolutions, New Years, and my favorite; my book of 2017. As Chapter Twelve is coming to a close I embrace these moments ever so tightly. Realizing the beauty and wonder these find me in, engulfed in feeling ever so effervesent as the bubbles in our Champagne flute dance with delight, so do these last moments of this year. 

Day 364 of 365 for me is a bittersweet reflection. I see before me the things I did not accomplish or excel at. I also see the things I did and the changes this year brought into my life and I marvel at these all realizing how each moment was a piece to the puzzle, of the bigger picture I was unable to see at the time.  Most importantly looking back over my life book of this past year, I am given the invaluable gift of seeing the struggles and hardships and how now I stand taller and stronger because of them.  I am able to look back as wisdom whispers ever so softly that Life is so much more than one mind could ever perceive or heart would ever be able to contain or possibly Dream. With a heart overflowing with gratitude and love for all of my moments this past year I expect at Midnight to be one of great emotion. The irony of moments throughout my life in which it seemed I had failed, now looking back gauging upon the now I am able to see how I possibly could not, would not be able to Dream the Dreams I have now without those moments I was merely wishing away.  I love seeing all the posts and I am inspired by the peoples passion I follow for living and relishing in all they experienced. Fired up and Power packed adrenaline surges for their New Year and wishes to all who read it. As I sit with my notebook examining resolutions from the past, I cannot help but react with a glimmer in my eye and a smile so mischievious that the ole sly fox is jealous. Wonderment consumes me transporting me into the vast unknown, liken to the astronauts as they take flight into the great vast world while we often times consume ourselves on the small and somewhat petty issues at hand not realizing that our focus becomes reduced and we are inefficient in not only achieving our Dreams and Goals but overachieving becomes reduced to getting by.  As my pen becomes fueled with Magical flair I am delirious when I realize before me is a blank sheet of paper waiting on me. Life is waiting on me. 

I realize I often speak of my Daughter, however her life and my job as her Mother showers me with invaluable nuggets of truth. The relevance of stages in our lives and in pursuit of our Dreams will often not come until we are ready. As I grow older, I am forced to learn to embrace this period of time necessary to allow myself to flourish in ways necessary to be responsible and equipped. How many times have we had our children beg us for things that simply was not their time and the unexplainable mystery of why it is not time is relevent to us when going after our Resolutions and Dreams as well. This picture will be framed and a given reminder for when I miss it with her and also to encourage me to keep going and never give up to dare to follow my Heart. I mentioned in a previous blog about her being on the JV Girls Golf team it was one of those moments I went all in following only my heart and gut with her challenging me all along the way. There were the moments I struggled; it was intense. I was debating and doubting myself asking close friends was I wrong to push her. For Christmas she received a new set of clubs and her High School names bag she will use on the jv team. Understanding my Daughter went out for the tennis team and I believe life would have been just fine had she had made the team. It was one of life's lessons when her friends made it except for her and she took in stride. This is where I saw her all along within the helm of my soul. It has been such an invaluable ridiculously phenomenal joy (and relief) to watch her unfold. Her reasons for challenging me and refusing this notion were figments of her imagination. Ideas and ideals that she has learned were not true and her confidence is growing emitting a beautiful fragrance as a field of flowers. My Daughter learned and taught her Mother lessons to reflect on for times to come. As I mentioned she stated this was her Favorite Christmas but what I didn't share was us on Christmas Night with my Family. While we dined on a Feliz Navidad Menu, My Daughter, Camille went around the table asking everyone what was their most special gift. Want to take a gander at what she had to say? Everyone at the table errupted in cheers, clapping and hooting with emotion so intense it was spewing from her as a gyser. 

As we bask in the last hours of this year may we take the time to look over our lists and measure them with our Hearts. May we all raise our glass and erase the negative notions that people, society itself and most of all ourselves try to sway our Passion. With a heart full of Gratitude as I sing Old Lang Syne I am overcome with thankfulness of all of life's experiences this past year and the many years before. The Wonderment of Life is what is to come and the ability to not only Dream the Impossible but to live them. 

Happy Merry New Year xoxo 

I'LL BE HOME FOR CHRISTMAS

Working out today Micheal Jackson's Don't Stop til you Get Enough came on and in a moment it is as if I appeared on the red carpet as the velvet rope was opening for me as the door opened  the door man smiled calling me by name. He said they had been waiting for me to arrive. It was my very own Studio 54 the lights were dim; allowing the inside warmth to embrace me. Lights flickered from all directions harmoniously in sync with the music that played. Everyone there was friendly smiling as if we knew one another knodding our heads some lifting their hands to wave exchanging conversations between our hearts and souls without a word being uttered. I was drawn to the dance floor moving simultaneously to the beat of the music that played. I looked up as if the melody placed a finger under my chin and the D.J. and I smiled at one another. I found myself picking up a headset, putting it on and adjusting the controls before me. Allowing the beat to drive my mood to keep this party going as to choose the given tunes to keep the energy strong within our midst. I liken this to Life and our daily drive to Dream. What is poignant to me in this instance and M.J.'s song, we have the opportunity to say what is enough.  Not our situations, circumstances, friends nor bystanders. Most importantly, our feelings alone are not in authority, liken as to be our workout partner and hold us responsible. Imagine being in the midst of an intense workout; our feelings alone might tell us to slow down or to stop because we have simply had enough. In essesence we were on the cusp of new limits and soaring new heights. 

I believe Christmas is the Grand Finale to our Year excluding New Years Eve of course. Somehow New Years got to piggy back on all this lingering Holiday embodies. I not only celebrate the birth of Jesus during this Holiday I see it as a new beginning; because of  my faith and what I believe His birth represents. I am compelled year after year to strive as the approaching New Year draws near that somehow, somewhere I am able to be more. To do more. That somewhere in the midst of it all, it no longer is able to suffice. Perhaps I have experienced growth. Maybe Laura Ingalls Wilder is correct when she was quoted as saying, "We are better throughout the year for having, in Spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time." I find it an Honor to reflect upon my childhood not only with my Mom but as I stated last blog about my Grandmother's.  They presented me with that everlasting gift to enjoy and share especially during Christmas. Sometimes we reflect upon our past and want to yield a different crop. Oftentimes now my Daughter will strut her independance as the less than a month away teenager and only put a dozen ornaments on her tree in her bedroom because I pack way too many on mine. I giggle wondering how many times I must have said the same only to find myself many years later wishing I could have a manual for how these Ladies did things. All in all, may I be one of her many extremes as the points in a star for her to balance between finding what is her.  As I have overdosed this Holiday in Hallmark movies, I realize sometimes life events have caused us to close off a part of ourselves or lose our way in the Magic this Season truly holds. I think of that song It only takes a spark to get a fire going.... and soon all those around, will warm up to it's glowing. Christmas Magic is unleashed within the each of us when we emit that force to ignite all those we encounter. 

Christmas at Grannie and Papa's growing up was completely opposite of Gran and Grandaddy's. I am utterly grateful for the contrast for it found me dabbling between the two extremes in life as I am as flighty as a Bohemian gal yet grounded and rooted with the passion for depth. Christmas Eve at Grannie's was a fabulous party. My Mother is one of seven children so just their immediate family was quite the gathering. Grannie's Home was opened up to extended family friends, neighbors and friends of friends who arrived as mere strangers but always left embraced and revered as Family. I always found this utterly charming and endearing. These Grandparents lived about three and half hours away in Panama City, Florida and as we drew closer my Heart would anticipate and long for how the evening would go. As an old comfy sweater or worn in blue jeans or jacket, it was soothing not only to reminise on these times but being in the midst; for it was Home. I can still smell her Home after all of these years and hear the chatterings of the people that stood shoulder to shoulder filling their spacious home. Being led by the aroma from the foods that lined her table spilling over and flooding her kitchen. I would step up into her dining room out of the living room there was more food than imaginable. Year after Year the recipes you grew fond of anticipating beautifully displayed before you, sighing as eyes closed as that first taste of Christmas hit your palate.  Grannie always got up and performed a childhood skit from somewhere in her youth. The piano was played by an aunt where another would help lead us in carols. My uncles would gather and sing quartet. All was Merry and Bright. Laughter and Joy were in attendance in big measure. We have Dance Parties on Christmas Night with my Family it has become Tradition gifted by Grannie from Christmas with her and making it my own as I celebrate me Home. To this day I stay up til the wee hours in the morning dancing in my kitchen,  baking Family favorites from my Grannie's; each year adding to the list. In an instant I am a child again. However there is more, I am looking into the most beautiful pool of blue eyes that I am imparting this sense of Wonder. The Wonderment of Life is never stopping or believing and in this Season, in the Spirit of a child; to lose ourselves in Christmas Magic at every age. 


Amy Grant sings these lyrics and my gift to you, My Grown Up Christmas List. 
Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies
Well I'm all grown up now
and still need help somehow
I'm not a child but my heart still can dream.
So here's my lifelong wish
My grown-up Christmas List
Not for myself, but for a world in need
No more lives torn apart,
Then wars would never start
and time would heal the heart
And everyone would have a friend
And right would always win 
And love would never end, oh
This is my grown-up Christmas List 
Merry Merry xoxo

PRANCE AND DANCE

Sitting on the floor of my attic drinking in the Christmas decorations that surround me, savoring as a fine wine as if I am swirling my glass then inhaling, indulging in the aroma of the wine then sipping, allowing it to slip through my lips swirling in my mouth noting the body and bouquet,  determining if it is more complexed or is there that sense of elegance and completeness which is the hallmark of a great wine calling it balanced. I gaze over all these decorations allowing them to speak to me to inspire my being as to how to showcase them; deciding what will make the cut this year and what will I leave stored. With my Daughter an official teenager next month I have a growing portion that she has undoubtably outgrown, I feel my heart tingle as I pick up a few and as if the doorman ushered me into the days of old it is liken to a slideshow playing in my mind my chest warms and the tears well up as I smile from deep within my being. Reflecting not only of my Daughter's Christmases but of my own as well as this time of year for in my world you have Jesus' Birthday, Santa Claus, Mom, my Daughter and my two Grandmother's. Gran was the epitomy of Christmas Magic in live form. These Grandparents of mine lived away, so we didn't get to see them often but when you did they were filled with moments to last a lifetime. I believe it is predominantly because of her Heart. She wore it out there on her sleeve loud and proud. She was a tiny little woman short and weighing about eighty five pounds and truly a gift to me in every way. She poured herself into me from baking with me to marathon telephone talks since I was a toddler, to letters by the truckload writing me stories of her daily things that came to mind drawing me into her world with every letter drawn. Wooing me with her playful spunky personality she made the mondane extraordinary. 

Gran's letters were mostly of walking to the market with one of her Sisters and her daily routines that filled her day but she was taking me with her all the while unbeknowst to me, she was pouring into me that desire to write because of my escapades with her through her letters. Distance was no longer an issue instantly we were drawn together in the most beautiful of ways; from our Hearts as she was sharing with me what is my greatest passion today, my Home. Not to be confused with my House, and although I love my House dearly; Home is my Heart. Gran beautifully lived out the saying, Home is where the Heart is. She was Home to me and still is today. My Daughter and I now make ornaments like Gran used to and I bake in excess having all night baking sessions dancing and singing in the kitchen and I know Gran is in every move I make. Growing up I cannot recall one Christmas present I ever received from her purchased, but she is Christmas to me and fuels my passion of this Season beckoning as she whispers within the smallest of things for they became mighty as they were fueled with all her Soul. We would receive care packages from Gran at Christmas, filled with canned pickles, jams, jellies, candies, cookies, homemade dolls and ornaments and the like of these things.  The value on her carepackages were immense and still hold high as the best gifting. At Christmas we can easily lose our way if we are not careful as in daily life itself and miss the treasure of the moment by being real and authentic while moving by the very rhythm of our own heartbeat and impact others as my Gran. 

Notice in these pictures both Gran and my Mom have their eyes on us in every picture and I find myself noting they are on either side of us, surrounding us as if by design.  They were honed in like my favorite song by Chase Rice, "Eyes on You" channeling their very souls pouring out as that fine blended wine. "I was waiting on something exceptional," is one of my favorite lines in a beloved movie.  Exceptional defined is surpassing what is common, usual or expected.  We have just a few more weeks in Chapter Twelve of the Year 2017. There is still time to dust off those Resolutions and Dreams that were inside of you around this time last year and undoubtably a few new ones. What a gift for yourself to reflect and revamp where needed. As we beautify our Homes with the glow of lights and beloved smells of the best time of the year,allow yourself to drift back to the days of old and see just what life has taught you. Moreover, what people have taught you and shaped your being without realizing you were even under construction.  The Wonderment of Life is  realizing that the exceptional are moments intensified with our very being exuding such raw and undeniable realness that transforms the common into the uncommon. People are our greatest gifts and I believe that everyone is placed purposefully in our paths liken to the journey to Oz. Dorothy while following her Dream came across the others not by mere chance. These days are full of wonder and Magic they are in all of the songs, the movies, it is the twinkle in the eye of every one you meet. My Grandmother's taught me that Christmas Magic lives way beyond childhood and they lived it out until their final days and shared with us their families the best present to believe and relish in Christmas Magic. 

I will share about my Grannie next blog irronically polar opposite but perfection implored as they graced my life and gave me the gift that keeps on giving for a lifetime. We would alternate Christmas with the each of them and today my Christmas season is intertwined with the beauty of the both of these souls. As you sit by your fire and bask in the beauty of this Season, take a trip within your own soul and unleash that force within you that was designed to run free full of meaning to be felt. What is it you truly want to feel and see this Christmas? As I always say this time of year, anything is possible if you believe....  Turn this song up to ten, I guarantee you will be dancing and showering those all around you with your own magic... the perfect gift, your very heart and soul.
                                Merry Merry xoxo

EUCHARISTEO (THANKSGIVING)

Throwing the ball for my dog to fetch as I lie on the sofa pouring over recipes of days gone by, my mind laden with cold medicine I close my eyes hoping to find relief to my stuffy head and achy body.  I allow my mind to roam as emotions are flowing , I truly believe that everyday should be Thanksgiving and the day itself has never been that poignant for me. Over the years I would volunteer to various places emboding the gift of giving to others from a heartfelt  gratitude of all that I had to be well thankful for but this year with me being sick I was unable to get out there for fear of spreading it to another. My mind recalls Thanksgivings of past as a slideshow of memories engulf me. I recall being a teenager and coming home from Downtown feeding the homeless. The intoxicating aromas lavishly flowed, billowing from the kitchen as I stepped inside of Home. I breathe in now as I close my eyes,  if only I could possibly dare to drink in that moment again, not just of the fragrance but that irreplaceable gift of Home. I believe it was that year or shortly soon after, being the last that Mom was ever able to cook leading our Thanksgiving meal as the Matriarch to our little Family. Perhaps that year was more piercing just coming into what seemed like a palace after being with those who did not have Homes or food as we did. Understanding that we too did not have a lot monitarily as my Mom was left unaided by my Dad to provide for us yet we rarely noticed it in hindsight. I remember how she would have that twinkle in her glorious big green eyes when she dazzled her beautiful smile unveiling those large pearly white teeth when at times she would playfully invite my childhood friend Tracey over for Dinner as we would be having "pretend roast"; it was the cheaper meat but we dined as if it were the finest in the land. What I now know flash forward to today raising my own Daughter it is my rendition of back to the future I realize it is all of these moments of life my Daughter will be remembering on her Thanksgivings looking back. 

This year my Mom said with me being sick let's just pick up our meal and enjoy it so I can rest. Quickly and firmly without any hesitation I dispelled that notion and said the show must go on! I am now about to go to the Grocery to gather our items and I do not believe I have ever been more giddy about cooking and baking just living this moment of Thanksgiving Eve and setting the table for those family members who will join us tomorrow. Looking over the old recipes my Mom's handwriting is engraved on my Soul my eyes  tear up as her penmanship is rather poor these days but what delight I find in admiring these. I asked my Godchild and Daughter the other day what do they want me to make, he is twenty one and rattled off our oldies but goodies, it was truly a gift, realizing these are now part of his heritedge of Thanksgiving and somehow I am part of this and for that I am overwhelmed with Gratitude. Perhaps it is the cold medicine or perhaps I am having an encounter with the true spirit of Gratitude in Thanksgiving this year but I feel stout hearted and solid as in our Pilgrims and Indians in the first Thanksgiving for my heart is full and happily content. I am feeling the Spirit of my Grandmother's who are no longer here alive within my being, catching glimpses of moments with them both in their kitchens back to where they soulfully prepared our meals. You could never eat enough to suffice them they always wanted to serve you more, the more you ate the happier they were! Them in their kitchens was poetry in motion; it was liken to making music it moved you from the earliest of years, I truly believe often times when we follow certain recipes to the detail but something just isn't the same, I believe it was that passion they invoked. Today I realize, I can make a meal, then I can make a meal. Perhaps it is the tenacity within me churning away to muster up the needed stamina to whip this up but there is an awakening in the depths of my Soul and I can tell you it is like I have never encountered. I believe as I have been searching within my own definements I have uncovered so much more. 

As the Indians and the Pilgrims were searching for their new found life let us stop and explore that which we are earnestly seeking that maybe no one may even know but it whispers in the night or it yells over the crowd watching the football game it is imminently there and as that delicious aroma beckoned me from my Mother's kitchen, teasing and tempting my nose it led me by a powerful force an unction to follow. Our First Thanksgiving is a beautiful reminder to dare to Dream and follow after those desires that tell you there is more. We all are on the path to something new and on a quest to follow after our Hearts to come together and regardless of our differences, embracing the things that bind us together from our roots; our Hearts.  

I saw this today and anyone who knows me understands how poetically correct this is of me. I live for fun and depth of meaning and I utterly despise the boring and mondane. The Wonderment of Life is being able to sit; regardless of your choice of meal we have the opportunity to dine as special as our First Thanksgiving Forefathers. May we stop and reflect with Hearts full of Gratitude of all we have and all we are to be. Whether your task is picking up the wine or flowers may you as our Grandmother's soul cooking infused our food with delicious heartfelt ingredients may you exude that to those you share your Thanksgiving with to create an unforgettable memory and if we are lucky it will continue long thereafter the Holiday. The picture at the top of my Daughter and I was her 5 years ago, in second grade on Thanksgiving Eve where she served at our Camellia Ball to the Debutantes where it is framed in my Dining Room and found it timely to share. What awakens within me as this seems like merely yesterday when in essence it was half her life ago. Life is ever changing and we too must move with it but never away from our Hearts as the very thing that we are implored by Shakesphere "To thine own Self (Heart) be True." Happy Thanksgiving xo

PERCEPTION VS REALITY

I lean in with all the weight of my body pushing the door as tightly closed as possible on Halloween decorations, eyes scrunched tightly closed mouth pursed and my body stiffens as I start to release my weight wincing in the thought of the door bursting open and Halloween bellowing from this closet. My body straightens and my head perks up with delight as I pat my hands with satisfaction that alas I had succeeded. One of my favorite things about decorating for any given Holiday is the immsense anticipation that overcomes me as I try to take a gander of the days ahead and what just might lie within them and also; in the taking down of these decorations it is a time of reflection for me, of the moments and memories that now make these items more beloved and evermore special. It isn't merely the fact we love each of these items for the given Holiday we celebrated, moreover it is the giggling as we unpack and thought provoking place as we recount the stories these items hold, eyes twinkling with wonder of what is to come. I am in the process of pulling out Christmas and I am one who still believes in Christmas Magic where anything is possible. I shall leave my Dining Room in tact with the Thanksgiving theme and splashes of our heartfelt gratitude laced within Christmas around. My heart is merry and excitement bubbles up as my percolator coffee maker hums as it brews our special blend for one of my favorite words has been and shall always be Gratitude. I have written about this in past blogs and pray it will always be the unspoken presence within my words and actions. It is as when the knob is turned on the propane tank unleashing from within it's container to light my firepit so shall our actions and words ignite when fueled with this powerful force. 

In this beautiful holiday approaching of Thanksgiving, my thoughts focus on how the Pilgrims and the Indians came together and Celebrated. What I find for me in my life and in my Home with my Daughter is they Celebrated their uniqueness. I love this picture because it shows the serving of one another, despite their differences. Their differences were many but poetically they wove together a glorious tapestry of History that is still revered today. In fact History teaches us it was in 1621 that the Pilgrims and the Wampanoag Indians gathered in Plymouth for an autumn harvest celebration that is now regarded as the "first Thanksgiving." 

A week or so ago I was in a meeting with my Leaders from my Girls Non Profit Group. These are dynamic young women, spellbounding leaders in the making and already trailblazing in their Schools and Community. I often find myself taking notes from them, as I believe they too are doing with one another. That is where the power of our connection came that evening. In a moment of me pointing out certain girls who were the President of their Senior Class, Azalea Trail Maid another, Tennis Player and Cheerleaders giggling broke out. I stopped in mid sentance my smile could not be contained as I took a gander by asking what was so funny. They were giggling because who I thought was a cheerleader didn't make it this year. I felt so small and horrified that I might have embarrassed her when indeed, they grinned from ear to ear. I attested that is where their power would undoubtably come; it was from them not making it. It was as if the beavers had went on strike and that dam burst loose with waters rushing fervently. Our conversations and hearts were interwoven as you see the doves or tiny birds who fly with the ribbon to Snow Whites hair. The chatterings were turned up to ten as hands were going up and smiles around as we were able to all unmask where we don't always have it all or missed the mark.  I know my hand went up as well and we came together in such a way smiles everywhere with everyone able to be free to be themselves. We all agreed what a sensation this was that needed to be shared amongst the girls on each of their teams because daily we are all striving to obtain our own goals, dreams and following after the unique beat of our own heart. Some needing to be coaxed to begin or get back to it, regardless, encouraging one another by our own fears, limitations and sometimes failures. The Wonderment of Life is despite it all to keep going fervently wholeheartedly within the scope of your own vision to seek that which sets your Soul on fire. Man or Woman, regardless of the age.   

I find myself today as I type this blog in the midst of a beautiful season, that within the depths of my Daughter. I only know how much she has changed her almost thirteen years and I cannot begin to phathom all the changes ahead. I find myself as these teen years impeed that in one split second I am holding tighter to the reigns yet in the next, loosening them for her to run. All the while keeping  the gentle nudges and sometimes kicks to get her back on track. The path I refer to in this instance is her staying true to who she is and what she is passionate about. She went out for the high school jv tennis team and she does enjoy this sport and she played with such a passion it was seen and felt however she lacked the practiced skills. Alas, she did not make the team however; we decided to stick with it and keep practicing and playing elsewhere and try out again next year if she felt so to do..... only requirement, don't give up. I wanted her to go for golf from the beginning, but I was dismissed quicker than yesterdays news. I circled back around and made the calls and contacts to see if it was still an option to have her play. She fought me like a wild horse that refused to be saddled at first. You see my Daughter enjoys playing but feels it isn't "cool" to play it wasn't that she did not want to play but how others would view her. She is now learning how so incorrect her preceptions and notions were from them.  Knowing my Daughter as I do often over the years of dropping her off at golf practice the entire way there she bellowed of how much she disliked this sport yet every single time when I picked her up she beamed and boasted of how much she loved it. So I explained to her I guard her heart with all I have but I truly felt she had to go for this just to see what comes of it. She is now a part of the JV Girls Golf Team at her upcoming High School.  She is now becoming less skeptical and finding fellow friends who share this interest. She is starting to get that twinkle in her eyes and I am overwhelmed with the Gratitude that Life is full of wonder. 

I dedicate today's  blog to the Life and Memory of my second Daughter, Claire Hope Oct 3-2006 - Nov 28-2006 who eloquently taught me the power of today and living real and authentically. As we go into Thanksgiving this year to Celebrate with our Family and Friends may we permeate the gift of Gratitude in such a fresh and personal way from the depths of our very own Hearts and Soul and serve those around us, celebrating who they are as we all chase our Dreams and Goals that just might too go down in History as the Pilgrims and the Indians. This is The Wonderment of Life. 

TIPTOE THROUGH THE TULIPS

Scrambling down my ladder feet in tune of Marky Mark's Good Vibrations that just came on my speaker, I reach for the remote and as I rewind the song to restart it, my head just nods in sheer satisfaction and I cannot contain myself from the energy and emotion as I pump up the volume.  As a soap opera stare comes over me and a smile that draws from deep within, giggling as I board this magic carpet ride for in a sheer moment it takes me back to days of old and my cd I still have, Jock Jams. My Daughter who is almost thirteen has this on her phone as well as it is a favorite in both our playlists. The feeling is electric and gets my Soul to moving not just in past time but in present day time in the here and now as if declaring unto this dusty living room I am cleaning to take note that I am at large and in charge of this moment, my moment; feeling that vibration that is oh so good free to be me.  One of the things that I truly desire as part of my Legacy is my desire for living in the moment and making those moments matter to continue on.  Perhaps it is my Destiny as the series of events occuring shaping my life as a young high school girl taking care of her Mother who was extremely ill and society was not quite ready to embrace her disease; if it truly ever will be. I learned how important the mood or tone of our Home (heart)  was as it could be downtrodden or depressing at times so I learned the power of celebrating the here and now. Flash forward to me in my late thirties and my second child is terminal given perhaps eight weeks to live, but daily it was uncertain if today would be her day to go....liken as to when you stop and truly appreciate this moment, your moment, none of ours are certain; we just simply take for grandit it will be. Furthermore I believe this is what leads us to miss the ordinary, perhaps by chance, coincidence moments that were laced with all the depth our souls search for.

When I first started blogging I titled this as I did for this very reason. Life is full of Wonder and Wonderments as George Strait sings I saw God today, this is my variation, my call to take hold of the here and now to unleash your passion of your dreams within your heart;  writing out into the unknown as my messages in a bottle to drift to the shores and into the hands in hopes to inspire and move those who read my words. As  I have written in past blogs, the good, the bad and the ugly moments are quintessential realizing that perhaps only in the looking back will those hard times be appreciated for without them you would not be  where they escorted you. Realizing you were ushered here only because of those moments. I read something the other day that goes along perfectly, 
"If you are only looking for God in the spectacular, you'll miss Him in the ordinary." Ordinary is not an accepted description in my vocabuary describing any element of my life... or -perhaps I am referring to only part of it's definiton because as defined as an adjective part is as I speak of to be bland or common however, it goes on to define it as inferior in quality, deficient. So go back and read that quote and replace it with deficient in quality and it truly ressonates.  It is when I stop to appreciate and drink in the here and now allowing it to permeate my being I am transformed. In a day in which we find ourselves unable to relish in these moments of Halloween the real meaning of the eve of all Saints Day on November first and All Souls day on November second which is a holy day of obligation for us Catholics and very special to anyone who has lost someone dear to them; because, immediately your attention is taken to Christmas being decked around the stores it is as if Society has missed the dearest meaning of life; the here and now. Right now. As in playing my Daughter in tennis I have learned that if I concentrate on my hitting the ball and following through all the way, then after my follow through do I move to prepare for the rallied return of the ball I will be ever more effective.  I believe with every fiber of my being we are where we are by design and our passion and dreams are what fuels the magic to make that carpet take flight for us to ride. 

I find myself exstatic to go see Ferdinand the movie as I have always adored the story of him. I have enjoyed listening to Nick Jonas singing the song Home to this soundtrack. When I think of Home I think of homebase as I stayed up late watching the World Series the other night wrapped up in the intoxicating enthrallment of watching not only the players run to it but their team mates in cheering them on and enjoying that moment celebrating. I too felt as if I had crossed that base. I think of the Home team football game as I was cheering last night for my Daughter to cheer for her boys in school's football team celebrating those moments to hallmark plays (and phenomenal cheerleaders of course). Above all when I think of Home, it is always undeniably my Heart and where life was truly lived.  The saying could never be more bona fide, unquestionable or factual;  Home is where the Heart is. Perhaps I would still be this Celebrating Sensation of Moments and following your Dreams nonetheless, however, I am solid and fortified after building my life  with the added given variables that seasoned me. 

Ferdinand shows us that just because he was a Bull, he did not have to act as one,moreover,  he inspired us all by merely following his heart. We are made to be uniquely wholeheartedly who we are regardless of anything external. Often times when I feel out of place because I am driven to follow my passion in my heart I chuckle and feel so invariably satisfied as I picture big ole Ferdinand happy as can be sitting under the tree smelling his beloved flowers.  I love the movie The Blindside when Sandra Bullock realized how Micheal Oar was too Ferdinand (we all are in fact) and channeled his passion, leading his heart by him playing football like what his dream in his heart was, his family. May we all live in such a way that as these examples showed great determination to be who they truly were inside to the very depths of their Soul; henceforth making the vibrations in their lives good and inspiring those around them as well. The Wonderment of Life is being able to feel the good vibrations where there were none. Often times I am grabbing my jumper cables in the ordinary times  to crank it up being charged from a deeper force that unleashes my Heart with Passion liken to a lamp that merely is a pretty decorative piece until it is turned on in the dark. May we all light up our worlds this weekend finding delight and satisfaction in clicking our ruby red slipper heels together and whisper there is no place like home... our hearts. 

The picture I chose at the top is special and relevant to this blog because it was in the midst of a cheer game my Daughter yells out from the field to me in the stands and unctions for me to go take a picture of the sky. I missed that moment at first, I chuckled to those around me not getting what the fuss was about but when I got to where she beckoned for me to stand and take the picture I beheld the beauty not just of that sky but of her heart. Do not miss your moment of the here and now regardless where it finds you as her in the midst of cheering her heart was searching for so much more in her moment. She yearned to be blown away or inspired to feel good vibrations. The call to look deeper for more than a moment; well done my child, alas she succeeded. 

UNANSWERED PRAYERS

Fall is truly in the air, in such an exceptional force as if you could reach out and touch it. I would give anything to be able to spend many days this time of year when the leaves have peaked in the Mountains.  My bucketlist has places  somewhere different for me like Vermont or  Massachusetts, but would always return to my favorites where my heart is fond in North Carolina and Tennessee. Perhaps rent a convertable and just drive, drinking in the glorious colors as a psychedelic kaleidoscope, mulitcolored vibrant hues, so rich and intense as if the Mountains and tree tops are speaking audibly to you; beckoning you as your eyes are drinking in the bewitching beauty of Nature. Cool air blows through your hair as if resusitating you, reaching over to bring your jacket a little tighter closed, air so crisp you can hear it snap. Melodies of creatures singing beautiful ballads as if choreographed by the most skilled Maestros. My mind is frozen as if the train derailed in my brain that this majesty I behold became by these trees being themselves in order for these masterpieces to be unleashed and relvealed. In a world that demands we twist and contort ourselves in order to be the "norm" ideal, at the least accepted;  I find it incredibly liberating to bask in the moment and just be. 

Often times we mistake what "be" defines; we think of it like cruising, laid back, moreover, the definition of be is to exist, or live and Shakesphere's quote "to be or not to be," that is the ultimate question follows in the definition. In order to fully obtain our Dreams as I have mentioned; I have become acutely aware that our Dreams have to be fueled from the Heart with the breezy movement of Life as the trees that are fluidly moving not rigid and harnessed. Just as the Horse is something to marvel when the saddle is taken off and the Horse is free to run with their Mane blowing in the wind and you see the muscles as they stride, marveling in the beauty of their motion as they prance and dance. So our Dreams should be so inate within our Souls that as we move to obtain them people are moved, inspired by our Passion. Just as the leaves harmouniously change and beautifully work together creating a breathtaking view that moves you to the depth of your core. These trees were simply being who they were created to be. Blooming the colors emitting  their beauty not trying to be another color or shade. The Horse is not rigid in movement when it is free to run, moreover you are moved and amazed as you see them. My favorite time of  horseback riding is when the Horses get cranked up because they know they are close to Home. It kicks my adrenaline up a notch as I too can relate after a long day and sensing Home is near. 

I have never been one to follow the crowd, I'm the one who was always swimming upstream opposite often times. Even today at fifty. I see when someone disapproves, but this isn't their life it is mine. I am the one who will be responcible when I am sitting there having my Life read to me reminding me of my Story as in the Notebook. For me that is empowering and it unleashes within me swirls of energy that  fuel my being to conquer that which I desire. My Daughter is watching me and my choices in everyway dealing with my Lifestyle and I want her to be rooted so far deep as these glorious trees that when it is her time to "turn" as these leaves it is marveled and noted that it is her own uniqeness her heart and soul that shines out. Not the Dream Job, Dream Vacation, Dream Man (or Woman), Dream Family, Dream Home, etc etc that define her. Our Dreams are only to enhance that who our Core consists or we will find ourselves obtaining Dreams but rigid, unhappy, empty and unfullfilled. Recently, Hurricane Nate took down one of our Water Oaks from the roots, as it went down it took parts of two others beside it and crashing down on my fountain in the front yard. I was devestated and it felt as if the bones in my body had broken. After a few moments, I wiped the tears from my eyes and chose to be like those glorious trees and Horses and said, "lets roll Tammy,"  I went out and stopped the chainsaw worker and instructed him of my plan. It was effortless but beautiful. These men even teared up at the plan, because they saw my Heart and Passion. They do this all day every day, but these trees were different because they were mine and they knew it. 

Now I have these Chargers for my Dining Table and me, my Daughter and our Guests who dine at our table will be able to drink in the beauty of our trees...just in a new way. Moreover, these trees that were rooted most of all in my Heart will be used this evening for thirty High School students for their Homecoming Dinner as Chargers adorning their Dining Tables at a friends Home. Timing being played out so perfectly as I was finishing this blog my friend just so happened to text me pictures. I could not hold back the tears, one the timing is always right if we just hang on and keep on keeping on and two, I may not have ever seen my trees look more beautiful. 

I will keep so many chargers for myself; and I have creative friends who flow in their own ingeniuity helping me think of what to add to finish these to gift. The most beautiful part of all of this is that one day, long way down the road, my Daughter will be fifty and sharing with her own Family and friends setting a glorious table with these chargers from trees from her yard and tell stories that come to mind of her and her Home. The Wonderment of Life is, sometimes just what we think is our Dream was just part of the Story. Go after those Dreams but don't hold to them for your identity, you are more than the Dreams. People aren't wowed at the Dreams as much as when they are immersed and fueled with the Heart and Soul. That is what is awe inspiring so take that saddle off and follow your Heart as those Horses when Home (that is where your Dreams are kept always in our Hearts)  is in sight and run in a way of not only reaching your goal but changing others along the way. What truly is amazing is that my fallen trees will be shared in such a new way with people that would have never seen them in my yard, emitting the heart and passion I possess of my Home. Same to be said of you so let the wind blow and enjoy the breezes life brings and yes, even those strong winds, however; keep going after those Dreams even when they seem like they will never Happen or have crashed just like my trees.  I challange you to see where they take you if you keep your Heart and Soul rooted within the Core of who you are. The Notebook Movie became our Dream Life only after all the wind blew and Life happened to them; so just be... only you...The most Glorious Wonderment of Life. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2cqlL4r0was

FANTASTIC VOYAGE

Sitting amidst a pile of pumpkins and all things Fallish and Autumn, trying to spread this undeniable forcefield of feeling around our Home that my Daughter and I relished and literally frolicked on the Mountain Tops; attesting of it's phenomenal power to revive the soul and senses recently on a trip to the Mountains. I felt as if I were among Charlie Brown and the gang. Assessing this messy patch, devising a plan and waiting on the Great Pumpkin to appear. Even though today it is humid and raining and feels like a sauna outside, I find much merriment in sipping on my long awaited pumpkin anything hot beverage as the air conditioner blows in my car on high and I close my eyes and allow the intoxicating aroma to take me to cooler places. You see, that is what Dreams are all about. I giggle often when frequently asked, what is it I Dream of. I simply say, "What is it I don't Dream of?" At fifty I feel like Linus even now, I am sitting in my car where outside these doors and windows I should be on a beach somewhere; instead, I am envisioning cool, crisp breezes blowing, jumping on the back of a hayfilled truck or trailer full of undeniable energy snuggled up to the ones around me, excitement taking the wheel of this ride to where ever my heart takes me and just like Linus when he wrote to the Great Pumpkin that Patty had told him that He, The Great Pumpkin was fake and that he was wasting his time. Linus was bold and a great dreamer when he continued to write, "Everyone tells me you are a fake, but I believe in you. P.S.: if you really are a fake, don't tell me. I don't want to know."

This trip my Daughter and I took recently was a game changer for us both. I have always relished in Labor Day as our last hoorah of Summer only this year, it was time for a cool change and to Celebrate the coming of Fall. The weather was picture perfect, the views were more than picturesque and the company well it was more than I had ever dreamed of between me and my Daughter. You see, my wee one is becoming her own force with her own gumptions and developing her own views. It was "that" trip you knew that just as the Seasons change, so has my little girl. We decided to hike and climb and venture everywhere our Hearts led us. Isn't that what Linus was really saying? One particular Waterfall we chose to climb will always be that one I will enjoy telling as in the Notebook Movie, it will make the cut. We had pushed ourselves and hiked with the altitude against us, when going down 600 plus feet we were smacked in the face coming back up. I made certain I emphasised to my Daughter as we could have stopped at various points in our desend and been satisfied with turning back but I with all the passion I could envoke, imparted; we want to go all the way because we will often times later look back and wonder what we might have experienced. As I always ask her after she comes home from any trip or somewhere off, what was the best memory and moment and what do you now look back on and wish you would have done? She ignitied a flame into an inferno watching her. She took every "shortcut" and off the beaten path sliding down portions while holding onto vines and branches to climbing up on boulders and having her Mother call her back at times as if an adventerous toddler. She was like Jane looking for Tarzan she was in her element and I never would have thought so before. She kept telling how cool it would be to get lost and have to spend the night out there. One of these falls she had me overflowing with laughter as she quickly alerted the already pooped travelers they should just turn around now. In fact, to one group; she said, "Really, it is NOT worth it. Here, I will show you all our pictures and videos from the bottom, it is the same thing." They eagerly gandered to take a peep and listen to her. We all giggled but it hit me then how parallel this is to us in our own Lives and Persuit of our Dreams. 

We saved the best for last in all of our mountain fun, it was our climb to the top of Whiteside Mountain. We had the best time even when it was tough, we would sing everything from rap, to country, to pop laughing and inspiring one another that we were taking hold of this moment. I had brought one of my favorite picnic baskets from home packed with delectables fitting for our views to savor all our senses and fuel our souls to Dream. This particular one I did not bring it just tucked one of her favorite snacks I had prepared from home in our backpacks with some other snacks and waters. When it got tough and I know we both were chasing the thoughts out with a broom in our minds of stopping and settling for this view; because neither of us whispered one time, for it was not an option for us both. She even remarked as she saw other hikers embarking back down that chose that elevated view was enough; they were going to miss out.  She started chanting her favorite snack and water that she was rewarding herself once we got to the peak. My eyes filled with tears for alas I knew she got it, even if the tippy top picture of us both on this rock 800 ft higher engraved in the stone 4,930ft wasn't that great; she wasn't going to believe it. We were already at the highest incorporated municipalities at 4,118ft, wasn't that enough? My Daughter and I will attest those seasoned goldfish and bottled water have never tasted better then they did that day, at that precise moment; sitting on that rock, with that engraved altitude basking at the beauty we beheld. This is The Wonderment Of Life...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ouWQ25O-Mcg

THE POWER OF THE UNEXPECTED

I read on Twitter a post that said, "Refuse to settle for "Good Enough." Good enough is the song of the mediocre. Excellence, going the second mile is the song of the highly successful." This could not possibly better sum up our recent trip to Atlanta I took my Daughter and her friend to Chickfila Headquarters to tour their amazing spellbounding facility. I have mentioned in past blogs of my facination and enthrallment with this never cease to amaze me Company, well; I was blown away. In every way at every turn it truly was like a spaceship landed and hijacked us and took us to a planet that we only dream of. This Company, this man, started this Empire off this concept that I started out with, his from a bible verse he believed that the first mile is expected it is when you go beyond the expectations you went the second mile for what they did not anticipate. Shazam!! The Monkees are playing in my mind, "Yeah I'm a believer." We were toured by a family friend who works there as the backstage tour is closed for renovations til the New Year and what an experience it truly was. I am forever changed and inspired beyond  mere words that fail to convey the depths of my core this experience. It awoken my soul in every part from the slumber I did not realize was asleep heeding the call to compel me to be a better person, to do more than required even when I feel I have done so, now; I am constrained to do more. I have never traveled anywhere abroad or to neighboring cities that the people and place impacted me in such a vital way as this visit. Generally when I travel I bring home experiences to implement within my home sharing with family and friends but this was such a Battle Star Gallactica phenomenon my mind has still yet to decifer that which resonnates the most it is like they swarm within my mind as if twirling and I become dizzy. 


As I sit here before my computer, chin resting in my hand elbow locked and set on the desk before me gazing out the window eyes dancing from here to there trying to focus in order to slow my bewildering thoughts, alas as if a little girl and I have fallen down after a bout of ring around the rosies my attention is now distracted to the song playing in the background, "feels" by Calvin Harris, Pharrell Williams, Katy Perry and Big Sean, it pretty much sums up all I want to say about this encounter of the best kind. From entering their front doors and being offered coffee as we waited for our friend to touring the mindblowing facility straight out of a place where Dreams only had been before. There in the lobby she told us of how all the levels of floors above us the people gather weekly for devotions and when they announced no suit and ties and a business casual dress code the men all tossed their ties over into the lower lobby instantly I could hear the cheers of the employees as if I had been transcended in time it was so real it penetrated all senses of feeling, my eyes caught glimpse under the stair case in which a beautiful statue of Jesus washing one of his disciples feet with the bible verse engraved, we were treated to lunch complements of them for they feed their employees full blown (not just Chickfila) breakfast, lunches and break snacks ALL day long, every day complete with cappacino coffee bars to a state of the art gym where classes are also held with locker room fit for a king where all of these their spouses are welcome to join. To the most marveled inspired areas in which the employees are encouraged to venture away from their desks to allow the inspiration to flow I believe smoke was literally erupting from my brain as if it could not compute. 


It was as if everyone had been cloned by the mind altering mad scientist of good; it was as if we were the Aliens.  On the shuttle all of the men remained seated allowing the women to exit before they would even flinch to move showing more respect since I can remember as if I went back in time to the days of old. Everyone should consider touring this facility I will be speaking of it for times to come because it was that impactful to us all. These people glowed as if exposed to radiation, as the neon sign I took pictures of the girls in front of that read "Our Pleasure" it was the most refreshing outpouring of sincerity that I have ever experienced. It was heartfelt and the words were fueled with fire as on an arrow that went straight to your own heart. In the days in which we live if we could funnel just even a portion of this golden rule of doing unto others as you would have them do unto you would undoubtably change our world for the better, I see so much room for improvement in my own life to master this coveted trait. The Dreams that burn within my soul lie dull and tarnished if my focused aim is on myself alone. I learned there that in all of their high energy, high tech world of improvement, bettering and mastering solutions, new tactics, fresh approaches and ways to surprise their customers by imparting a feeling of pleasure it leaves you with such ecstasy you undoubtably will long to come back. Furthermore, if you are lucky enough to feel it you won't be able to stop yourself from passing it on. 


Stop and consider that which burns within you, that longing like the thirst that cannot seem to be quenched, wakes you up in the middle of the night sensation haunting you to chase after it might just be more powerful than you first imagined. Within the realms of your Dreams imbedded in your Heart just might bring that undeniable pleasure if you embrace the Soul of their roots. This man embraced his roots of the two mile rule and by implementing his heart and soul of who he was to his deepest core, the impact has been unfathonable. When we left this tour we were not discussing the original bat man car sitting in his automobile collection or how monitarily successful he became, moreover, how much we lacked and desired to strive to be a better person and give to those we come in contact with. The Wonderment of Life is to LIVE the Dream not settling for "good enough" but leaving that mark of Excellence in all that we do and most importantly in who we are. That my friends is what is truly sexy and needs to reminded in the days in which we live. I leave with you one of my favorite Entertainers who has been around my entire life and still going strong in his Seventies rocking our world. May we live in such a way as these two men, that our lives will be impacting others even just around us in their depth and length of their lives. I feel this song is as old as I am but it is a classic with a modern twist and I love the disco vibe so get lost in it as you watch it I haven't quit singing it since I saw it on the VMA's, I was utterly blown away how Sir Rod still has it. I have been to this rooftop bar many times and danced out under the stars, gazing at the City. May we heed the call tying on our tennis shoes and not settling at one mile but go for excellence and run two, revamping where needed and as we interact with people may we too from the depths impart it was truly My Pleasure. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDT_EZHiBaA

FERDINAND THE BULL

I was scrolling earlier on Instagram, it was as if this post reached out and grabbed my pajama top by its collar and pulled me in as if bringing these pictures to life. Right there in that moment there I was standing with Carrie and "Big" from the show Sex and The City. She is in a gorgeous couture gown, mesmerising chiffon and alluring in exquisiteness as they are gracefully stepping down the steps. She has the front of her gown gathered in her hand to lift to step with more ease and bellowing out from underneath are the glorious tule layers peaking out flirtaciously as Big is dapper and refined in his debonair suit as only he could pull that look off. The caption reads, "What you see...and what you don't see..." I scurry over the photo as a hidden pictures game I still to this day love to find in children's activity books; mind racing what am I missing? What is it I do not see? Alas, up in the top right hand it was as the fork that you almost didn't recognize in the leg of the table in the beloved childrens past time, was the number that there was another picture! Instantly, I swiped right to see the back of Carrie and Big and all the photographers and sightseers all gathered.... watching. I found myself swept away, pajama's and all and instantly, I could feel the breeze blowing as I saw in the picture of Carrie's hair beautifully swept back and giving her dress movement and the spellbounding fragrance of a bouquet in the wind. My head turned as  I heard all the shutters of cameras and conversations of the crowd that was watching you could feel their excitement and awe as they were able to see what very few of us at home could. I realized how poignant this was to us and our lives, very few only see our productions and our persuits of our dreams and goals they only see the scripted character we portray. 

I had been reading earlier in a blog/podcast by Danielle LaPorte titled Did you get interrupted on the way to "ideal"?  I was so moved it spoke of her looking back to her as a younger person she was quoted as saying, "Here's to me, to me in my tube skirt and cowboy boots, chugging chocolate milk on a Saturday morning for a tequilla hangover:
How do you want your future to feel? And she would have replied, wihtout hesitation, "I want my life to feel AMAZING!"And she wouldn't have a clue what that was going to look like. "Ideal" would have been a mysetery to unfold instead of a trail of milestones. And she would have known that....the detours and interupptions are warning bells and magic spells. Choose to unfold. It's way less predictable, less tidy, it's highly inconvenient. And it's where the power is. The kind of beautiful, gorgeous power you've been craving to feel your entire life. Every "image" I had of my "ideal" life has been interrupted, derailed, splattered on the road to this sometimes way too complicated, patience-of-Job, deeply deep and BEAUTIFUL life that I find myself in. CORRECTION: I didn't "find" myself here. I made choices to be here- right where I am. One choice at a time. Everytime you choose to go for a "feeling" instead of an "image", you're making a courageus choice."

One of the most memorable moments at any wedding receptions thus far was one I attended of a childhood friend's Daughter recently. They had booked a phenomenal band highly coveted as I have been told since then, the weather was just terrible, raining so much that the band refused to play. As you can imagine, the Parents were devestated; all the time, planning, preparations of this moment and they stood there watching the band pack up. Emotions flooded my soul as I couldn't fathom their feelings as having a Daughter myself. My respect for them was immensely increased as I watched them unfold their truest ideal of their first Daughter's reception and invoke their hearts and love by allowing their feelings of this moment to be their couragous choice and any of us attending were all touched by this. The wedding party scurried to gather cell phones and play lists and right there in the midst of the rain we danced and we sang and we Celebrated in what now I will never forget. I only hope I can react in the pureness with my Daughter's moments as I learned from these amazing parents. You see, as liberating as I am finding my current middle aged status, I am catching a glimpse of why we are often told to sit at the feet of the old aged as well (I will bet that this middle aged couple when they find themselves older aged will be speaking of this moment at their oldest of ages) as those who have achieved. You will undoubtably hear of the less tidy times, detours and interruptions that they will attest ushered them to where they were to be. I liken this to how Flora Bama hosts the Song Writer's Festival Annually, it is delightfully enlightening for me  to hear and learn of what "life" portrayed and how they felt; for them to be 
inspired and create the beloved song you sing of; causing it to resognate, and has more meaning. Realizing in all of these areas you were granted VIP backstage, behind the scenes access which solidified that which you were merely seeing by imparting that feeling.  The Wonderment of Life here is quoted by the musician of this song, "We wanted to capture the feeling of losing your way along the journey and then with a little help, finding your way back to the purity of the reason you ever began the journey..." 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFPtODPHcuM

COFFEE BREAK

I woke up with such anticipation and enthrallment of this new day, uncertain of what might unfold but the churning within was intense.  Every fiber of my being was assured that something was in the air as if proclaiming Marvelous Monday was on tap. I laid there singing Cat Stevens Morning has Broken looking up the lyrics and pondering on the words as if marinating my senses. Within moments of me leaving my bed that I invisioned as my cocoon unleashing myself into this vast world as a butterfly transformed from being a catapillar my surge of magnificence was being taunted and mocked as the melancholy raindrops fell and the party crashers of my moment were filling me with somber and gloomy sensations. Alas the enlightment of this day was something that came from so deep within, that it was as if I shooed the melancholy away with one effortless swoop. My best friend Marty, years ago worked at the YMCA and she would call Monday's Marvelous, she would even send out encouraging tidbits to banish the blues, empowering us all to make it mighty. As she would enter those doors to her work place, she would take on the tone saying Good Morning as if a command of greatness; even if it wasn't much to describe of as good. That was a lifetime ago but she is still that same force today, and those actions from so long ago, sprung to the forefront of my mind as this day was quickly unraveling scrambling to gain the reigns and alter the course by taking control. 

I sauntered over to meet my morning standing date with Mr. Coffee, blissful for I had moved him, feng shui if you will;  to a new spot and made for myself a beverage station with all my choices boutiqued and showcased for my delight. My steps were moving to the beat of various singers with their own renditions saluting "it's going to be a lovely day" trying my best to rap to the soulful s.o.u.l. s.y.s.t.e.m. and Bill Withers with B.I.G. even Kirk Franklin as they played on my phone rerouting the dreary and filling my soul with merriment. When that coffee had met my lips the corners of my mouth were turned up so far that a laugh slipped out, anything less than pure delight would be an understatement. It was as if I heard the bell ringing as my imagined gloved hand was thrown into the air as if by the referee in a boxing match and I had beaten my opponant. As I sat in front of my computer with coffee in hand and started this blog; my computer was stuttering whether due to the rain or the meloncholy had overtaken it I am uncertain, however; because of the hesitation of strokes on my keyboard;  my entire blog was erased in a moment. I was utterly stunned and speechless, it was almost completed and just like that it had vanished. The Wonderment of Life is not in having days flow perfectly and harmoneously with our desires and flights to achieve our Dreams and Goals, moreover; it is being able to soar and overcome that which tries to ground us. A quote came to mind by Markus Almond, "Things are never going to be perfect. The stars almost never align. We have to push them." At that precise moment I just threw my head back then shaking it I couldn't help but  chuckle as  I said "but of course!" At that moment that I walked away and made the decision to not let it get the best of me, I would choose to push them in alignment, it was then and only then it dawned on me; these are those moments the ones that try you, the moments that try to change you from who you are and what you are deep down in your core that we need to pay attention to and allow yourself to be rerouted if you will but never losing the Dream. I liken it to our GPS it has the destination set; it is up to us to trust in that and to follow the routes given even when they say make a legal u turn. 

I read this morning before I even left my bed that someone posted, Make Today so awesome that Yesterday gets jealous. Another that I marked was, "The lessons you learn, on your journey towards a destination, will always be more valuable than the destination itself." You see I fully realize and understand that many of the Dreams that I am persuit of I may not ever achieve however I am compelled to continue, just as I had awoken to feeling the marvels that today had in store, I prevailed against the obstacles that tried to vere me off my desired destination and although my day has not come to end as of yet, I am bold in assurance and stout hearted in fascination, engrossed in the moments that fill my day and making the most of every one of them. Just as a track runner will scale over the hurdle it is indeed something to drink in as you watch their form, their movement as they take flight leaving you gasping with amazement; may the same be said of us as we execute our day as others are watching how you master your hurdles.  One day they will call to mind as I did with my friend and her Marvelous Monday's and perhaps they will use your technique to master their own hurdles. The Wonderment here is,  I have been happier on this Monday because I made it happen when I could have chosen to succumb to the barracades instead I took flight. 

Today on Tuesday I am better for having my Monday, life is funny that way, mere perspective and how we choose to view our lives. I leave with you a song it is one of my favorites and I wear this baby out when I am faced with my roadblocks and before a line or two is sung and danced by me, my entire perspective has changed; so I found it so incredibly fitting for this.  It doesn't matter what your choice of beverage, liken to me in my beverage station sip on that ice tea maybe add some lemonade to it or ice down that diet coke and have your smile, just push yourself away from that desk at work and get to that water cooler and fix a little drink; the point is our attitudes will always determine our altitudes; you decide on how high you want to fly. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_Op0bQfMoo

BIG TIPPER

My daughter and I sat nestled together with our afternoon concoctions of our desired warm teas to soothe our senses and our soul. We sat on our leopard three seater chair in front of the enormous window, thunder bellowing the dark clouds closer, her long legs intertwined in mine while her feet were pressed upon the window to become part of the splendrous view; while sipping, reflecting, allowing our minds to flow freely as it may to carry us away. Interruptions of audible thoughts would spew out; sometimes just a nod was given in return as if mulling over what was just said, the slow type of nod as if each syllable is sinking into our deepest parts as the rain drops that were approaching for yet another wet afternoon would drench the soil. Some was just meaningless chatter like the weather and can we believe it is raining for the fortieth day in a row or whatever came to mind.  I have upon my coffee table a box of antique papers typed each one with a verse of poetry or food for thought to ponder upon. My daughter in almost one fluid movement was back snuggled in with this box in her lap and was reading a card she had selected. We would take turns choosing a card then reading, then as she reached for another card I whispered, "wait Boo" as if my hushed tone had reverenced this moment. I said what do you think that meant? I explained to her I bet we would have totally different meanings but we could each draw from the others perspective as in life itself. Later that day I saw on her Instagram post a picture of the following quote that she had picked up and read but we didn't discuss, however; she stated how much she liked this but my lingering desire is to know what fueled her passion in this statement. It read the following quote by Ray Bradbury, "We are all cups, constantly and quietly being filled, the trick is, knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out." 

Later that night I was up late piddling around the house, I have a room in my Home that is my most favorite room. It is very small and tightly filled with all things lovely to me. One of my best friends says it reminds her of Claire; my baby Daughter that passed away, which makes this room even more enchanting. It is tucked up higher in the house and you have to go through a closet we call it my Secret Room but it is liken to when I went parasailing in the Gulf and as they allowed me to float higher it was as if I passed that sound barrier, I liken this room to that. I am always changed when I leave this room I have my one cup coffeemaker that is stocked with various choices of beverages in there and I just invite and allow myself to be inspired. I went to bed that night thinking of that quote and I thought what in life do we drink in without quenching that thirst or cry out for as in the deepest craving left unsatisfied? I find it extremely exhilarating that one of the synonyms for crave is Dream. Coincidence? Oh I think not! I have people tell me that read my blog that they haven't allowed themselves to Dream much I tell them my Mom raised me to "listen to my body" it tells you when you are craving something, feed it; just all in moderation she would add.  At fifty I still go get that drumstick from Popeyes and dill pickle when I am sick as she would get for me when I was young because oddly enough it is what I craved; however the healing properties are something more for it feeds my soul and my inner core is renewed and invigorated for I have fed my deepest parts and it is satisfied. 

I believe when we are real with ourselves we are quietly filling our cups; our innermost parts that are dwelling deep and cannot be brought to life without being poured out. Think for a moment of that last craving you had, whether it was at midnight or midday, no matter how many substitutions you parade before that Dream or craving you might settle for pacifying  but only that one thing will do the trick. Often times I will be in utter disgust why didn't I just eat that one thing that I wanted instead,  I went around the world trying to give it something else? This craving is here to call you to be filled so in turn you will master the trick as in the quote and learn how to tip your cup over and all of your truest (stuff) will pour out causing those around you to be inspired and filled themselves beautifully.  When we hold back or lack the mastery of tipping our cup by spewing things that in essence are not our truest selves it left those around you dissatisfied same principal applies, why do we skim the foam off the top and pour our surface layer out to those around us when they were created with the craving of your deepest undertones. Why do we hold back in essence stifling out our own Dreams? I believe the "trick" that Ray Bradbury spoke of is us owning our Dreams and desires in such a way that we not only embrace but move in this force like a magnetic field. Even though I haven't captured all that my Heart and Soul drives me towards, my movement needs to be fluid embodied in this Hope of achieving then and only then will that passion spew forth as a busted pipe to inspire and intoxicate those around me to crave their truest parts be filled.  Just as our body will reject when we try to subside its longing for something else for it is deep imbedded when you crave, some of crave's other synonyms are the following desired intensely, cried out for, ached for, hungered for, itched for, longed for, pined for, thirsted for and yearned for. The Wonderment of Life is to live with all of our beings acting in the trueness and openness of our souls giving our Hearts in all we do that is when our words will spring to life as if resuscitated to those you meet that might have needed who and what you have to give. As you will see in this video in the very end, live out loud what drives you and see it's powerful impact. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PT4ryVop_Fc